mm crepes
So I watched the L movie!



The movie was basically 5 minutes of L being an incredible genius detective, and an hour and a half of one of those awful fanfics with a summary, like, "L is forced to babysit two children! What's our favorite genius detective going to do?" and it was full of INCREDIBLE HILARITY. L manages to remain the only person in the movie who can actually act, questionable science (tm) abounded, Greenpeace was in the rolling credits, which is hilarious if you've actually watched the show, and the unsung star was definitely the big pink undercover crepe van. Seriously, instead of Ryuk in the movie poster, they should have featured the crepe van. Flying. In the corner.

Basically, a bunch of environmentalists created a super-virus to wipe out the human population because we're destroying the earth, only the actual guy who cares about the earth gets knifed in the first 10 minutes of the movie by his underling, who is obviously evil because he's scarred and blind in one eye. And then it becomes a very confusing thing about bio-terrorism, with Questionable Science (tm) and people dying in incredibly unrealistic ways. The last 15 minutes of the show was an entire plane full of people dying in unrealistic ways, which was a little distracting from L performing great feats of physical athleticism like jumping onto a moving plane.

My verdict: Terrible movie, A++++, involving lulz such as:

1) L performing great feats of athleticism. I lost it when he appeared on the bicycle, he actually moved at a pace faster than a creeping stroll to an all-out sprint at several points, which I wasn't in fact sure he was physically capable of, and oh yeah, JUMPING ONTO THE MOVING PLANE. I actually think that he only did all that because he was guaranteed to die 23 days later, and hence could not actually get a heart attack at those times.
2) The bright pink ANGEL CREPE van.
3) Incredibly inappropriate statements of devotion shared between L and at least two people who are like, 2-3x his age.
4) Near is Thai, apparently. HAHAHAHA.
5) Almost everything L did.
6) L randomly manhandling the kids he was babysitting. Well, not so random, the girl was like "Shit, I'm coming down with ebola!" and L's immediate response is to pick up the other kid and bodily throw him out of the lab (or into a closet or something, I forgot where that door led). And he doesn't open the door again even when it turns out to be a false alarm.
7) Yeah, L really was babysitting two kids, my only response to that is L O L.
8) The poor abused FBI agent. Driving the bright pink crepe van. Which is fitted with incredibly high-tech information and surveillance technology, and also a fully-equipped crepe making kitchen.